meridian_rose

Title: Loss
Fandom: Legend of the Seeker
Pairing/Characters: Richard, Kahlan, Chase, Richard/Kahlan
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 647
Beta: Prompt: hrhrionastar, with my thanks
Prompt: For the legendland Seeker's Journal challenge and the 100_tales prompt 092 Loss
Summary: Post-Hartland, Kahlan wants Richard to confront his grief.
Warnings: Canonical character deaths discussed

Also @ AO3

Richard was quiet on the journey back to the Midlands to meet with Zedd and continue their quest. Kahlan understood. To go back to his home, from where he'd so recently had to flee, and see it overrun with D'Haran soldiers could not have been easy.

Before she'd come into his life, Richard had been a woods guide with a father and a brother.

Now he was the Seeker of Truth and his old life was gone.

Sometimes she felt guilty about that.

Not that it could be helped. He was destined to be the Seeker, just as she had always been destined to be a Confessor. It was too much a part of them to be denied. Even Anna, who clearly still had feelings for Richard, understood that. Maybe this wasn't the life Kahlan would have chosen, either, but she was committed to it, despite the sacrifices.

Dennee…

Kahlan glanced over at Richard, still staring sightlessly ahead, letting his horse lead the way. Chase was silent too, preoccupied with thoughts of his missing family. Kahlan prayed to the Creator that they could be saved. The family had been kind to her when she was a stranger to them, and their generosity had reminded her of better days back home.

There was, however, no saving Michael. Richard hadn't said a word at the funeral – in fact he'd seemed reluctant to attend at all. He was anxious to return to the Midlands, and his quest, and to help Chase. On top of that, they'd destroyed the boundary and now he could never even go home. Loss followed loss. It had to be taking its toll on him.

As this journey was on all of them.

"Richard, we need to stop," Kahlan called at last. "Richard!"

Richard blinked, startled from his reverie. "Yes. Of course."

They made camp and Richard made a fire. Chase took their horses to a nearby river to let them drink and cool down. At last Kahlan was alone with Richard.

When Chase had told Richard he was sorry about Michael's death, Richard had simply responded that they had to get moving. He could only hold his grief in check for so long, Kahlan knew.

"Richard."

He looked over at her. "What?"

She tipped her head. "Don't you want to talk about what happened?"

"What good will talking do?" Richard poked at the fire with a long branch. "We have to keep moving forwards. There's no point dwelling on the past."

He had a point. "But we can't forget," she began. Richard tossed the branch aside, eyes aflame with anger.

"You think I could ever forget? Do you imagine I'll ever stop seeing my father dead at my feet? Do you think I'll ever forget Michael dying in my arms?"

Kahlan opened her mouth but Richard wasn't finished. His became voice louder, but less coherent, choked with emotion.

"He blamed me for our father's death, and I never thought I could forgive him. But I did. He fought alongside me, and now he's dead. Is that what's going to happen to everyone I love?"

"Richard –"

"Are you next, Kahlan?"

She shook her head desperately. "No." She'd never leave him if she could help it.

Understandably, Richard was not comforted.

"No, maybe not. Perhaps the Creator protects the Confessor and the Seeker, even while their loved ones perish? Is that Her idea of justice? How is that right? Why should I live, and not them?"

He broke off, weeping now. Kahlan took a tentative step forward.

"It isn't fair," she agreed, and he pulled her to him and buried his face in her shoulder, giving free rein to his grief. Kahlan patted his back and made soothing noises, but felt tears welling in her own eyes.

Tears for her own losses, and for Richard's loved ones, and for the pain of the man she loved.